Man Throws Fries at Stepdaughter, Charged With Assault With Dangerous Weapon

A chicken sandwich propped up by a bed of weapons.

And the “dangerous weapon” tag has nothing to do with the caloric or sodium content of Mickey D’s french fries. According to CBS, 26-year-old James Hackett of Lowell, Massachusetts, got into an argument with his wife at a McDonald’s, and when his young stepdaughter attempted to break it up, he allegedly threw hot fries in her face. Hackett pleaded not guilty to the charge of assault with a dangerous weapon following his arrest. Massachusetts law defines a weapon as “an instrument of offensive or defensive combat; … anything used, or designed to be used, in destroying, defeating, or injuring an enemy.” Did you or did you not attempt to destroy your stepdaughter with those fries, Mr. Hackett!?