The Miami Cannibal Was High on ... Weed?

By

Almost as soon as Rudy Eugene ate the face of homeless man Ronald Poppo on May 26, it was assumed, for reasons not entirely clear anymore, that he had been under the influence of bath salts. But it wasn't bath salts. It wasn't LSD either. Or PCP. It wasn't anything. According to the results of the toxicology tests on Eugene's body, which have just been released, the only drug found in Eugene's system was marijuana, and as anyone who has smoked marijuana or been around people smoking marijuana or even seen people smoke marijuana in TV or movies knows, marijuana does not create the urge to rip somebody's face off. (Also, we are aware that there is a very obvious "killer case of the munchies" joke to be made here, but we're not going to make it, because we have decided that such jokes are in bad taste, no pun intended. Unless mentioning the potential for a "killer case of the munchies" joke counts as making a "killer case of the munchies" joke, in which case, we apologize.) 

Eugene, it seems, was just batshit crazy.