Michael Steele’s Mustache Is No More

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His face looks so naked.

What happened to Michael Steele's mustache?

a. It retired.

b. It was stolen and resold on the black market.

c. It was singed off in a tragic weekend flambé accident. 

d. It withered and died after Steele forgot to water it for a couple of weeks. 

Answer: (e) It was shaved off in a nod to bipartisanship, because both Democrats and Republicans agree that mustaches are ridiculous.