Scott Brown Says He Meets With Royalty Daily

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Daily work wear.Photo: TIM SLOAN/AFP/Getty Images

Senator Scott Brown is really pulling out all the stops in his hotly contested reelection campaign against Elizabeth Warren, letting voters in on previously undisclosed facts about his life. For instance, just this afternoon, a talk radio host accused Brown of running the campaign too much on the superficial (like, say, discussing Warren's disputed Cherokee roots) and not substance. His reply (emphases ours):

Each and every day that I’ve been a United States senator, I’ve been either discussing issues, meeting on issues, in secret meetings with kings and queens and prime ministers and business leaders and military leaders talking, voting, working on issues every single day.”

You heard the man! He works on issues, issues, issues with important people, some of them who own crowns and ponies and guillotines. Nothing superficial about that. But this also brings us to the real question. What exactly is the Junior Senator from Massachusetts talking about EVERY DAY with in secret meetings with royalty? Until he clears that up, we're going to draw the logical conclusion: He's having some sort of secret affair with Queen Elizabeth. Or, possibly, Carl XVI Gustaf of Sweden. Both?