Obama Speech Moved Inside Because God Hates Democrats, Too

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Photo: Mladen ANTONOV/AFP/Getty

The threat of rain and lightning has forced organizers at the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte to move Thursday's festivities, including President Obama's headlining speech, indoors. Obama was originally scheduled to accept his party's nomination in front of 65,000 supporters at the open-air Bank of America Stadium, but he will instead speak in front of about 20,000 at the puny Time Warner Cable Arena. Last week, Hurricane Isaac lopped a full day off of the Republicans' convention plans in Florida, and North Carolina has been sopping wet as well. In a statement, the DNCC said, "We share the disappointment of over 65,000 people who signed up for community credentials to be there with the President in person" and instead promised those ticket holders a future event with Obama, as well as a "national conference call" tomorrow, which, eh, no thanks.