Hillary Clinton Has a New Football Helmet

Photo: US Dept. of State

Back at work after fainting led to a concussion and then a blood clot in her head, Hillary Clinton was presented with some protective gear this morning. “As you know, Washington is a contact sport,” said Deputy Secretary of State Thomas Nides, presenting his eventually departing boss with a gift box. “Inside was a football helmet with a State Department seal, lots of good padding and also a football jersey that said Clinton on the back and on the front it says #112 which symbolizes the number of countries she visited as secretary of state” — and which would not even be valid in the XFL.