The Year’s Best, Worst, and Most Vaguely Racist Super Bowl Ads

By

Each year, Americans gather around their TV screens to eat like they're on death row and watch four hours of commercials occasionally interrupted by a football game. As we take a break from the ads to enjoy a fake singing performance from Beyoncé, here are some of the highlights and lowlights (??) of the first half. 

Update: Now with second-half ads.

Grossest Sound Effects: The sounds of this kiss made us lose interest in our wings for a while. Okay, for four seconds.

Worst Message: Driving an Audi gives you the confidence to sexually assault women.

Most Vaguely Racist: Is it racist to have a white American dude do a cartoonish impression of a black Jamaican? Kind of? Not really?

Least Realistic: Nobody likes the cookie part better.

Most Spoiled Children: Wait, so The Rock can't stop a bank robbery or save a cat because his kids need some milk for their cereal? Those kids are monsters.

Best Daniel Day Lewis Cameo: True fact: The goat is Daniel Day Lewis.

Best Totally Irrelevant Tale of Man-Horse Love: Man loves horse. Horse loves man. Drink beer.

Biggest Liar: Babies do not come from the planet Babylandia, liar.

Most Surprising Hair: What happened to Seth Rogen's Jew fro?