Which Cable News Anchor’s Attempt at Rapping Makes Us Want to Swallow More Rat Poison?

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In honor of Jay-Z being in The News, both CNN's Jake Tapper and Fox News's Dana Perino decided, apparently independently of one another, to rap on television today. The results were predictably unbearable, but which was more unbearable?

We're judging each clip based on the number of gallons of rat poison it makes us want to swallow. Up first, it's Jake Tapper:

How unbearable? Three gallons of rat poison. 

Now it's Perino's turn. 

How unbearable? Infinity gallons.