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Judge Can’t Sequester Because of Sequester

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Hates jurors. Photo: Bloomberg/Getty Images

The sequester, the name for congressionally mandated cutbacks in federal spending, has resulted in hardship and hard choices around the country. From those who rely on Head Start programs to those who enjoy watching things explode, millions are feeling the pinch. And now the sequester’s latest victim is … sequestering:

A federal judge in Brooklyn has rejected a request by prosecutors to sequester a jury in a murder and racketeering trial, citing the impact that federal budget cuts are having on the judiciary.

The judge, Sterling Johnson Jr., acknowledged in an order on Wednesday that the jurors in the case would benefit from protection, noting that he would keep their identities secret. But the judge said he would not take additional measures to sequester them because “the court must also be mindful of today’s economic climate.”

He can’t sequester because of the sequester! That’s kind of funny, right? We mean, it will at least be funny until a juror is murdered so that the country could save a few bucks, and then after that it will be quite tragic.