Carmelo Anthony Blissfully Unaware of James Dolan’s Band

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How Carmelo Anthony went nearly three years without discovering that his team's owner, James Dolan, sings "karaoke-grade" blues-rock with his band JD and the Straight Shot, we have no idea. But it happened, and his innocence is the envy of all the land. Or former innocence, we suppose. Anthony, having eaten from the Tree of Dolan, has now been banished from the Madison Square Garden of Eden forevermore.