Sarah Palin's war on Christmas media tour continued this morning on Fox & Friends, where Steve Doocy, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, and Brian Kilmeade valiantly attempted to interview Palin about a book that they had clearly glanced at for the first time three seconds before the segment began.
"Just in time for Christmas," shouts Doocy, who, having seen the cover of the book, was aware of its Christmas theme.
Doocy then noted his favorite part of the book. "I love the way, in the very beginning, you talk about how growing up in Alaska, you never had to worry about a white Christmas," he says.
This was, as Doocy attests, at the beginning of the book. The very beginning. It was literally the first two sentences of the introduction — "I've never had to dream of a white Christmas. Growing up in Alaska, I didn't have to imagine snow." This was the No. 1 part of the book that Doocy felt most compelled to mention.
Now it's Hasselbeck's turn. She idly leafs through the book's unfamiliar pages. "What do you want people to know about the book?" she asks Palin, in lieu of a question about the book's actual contents.
Back to Doocy again. He's opened up to the very back of the book, where there's a recipe for moose chili. "This, folks, could be the only book you can buy this season where it has a recipe for Merry Christmoose Chili," he notes, staring at the chili recipe. "Moose chili!"
Kilmeade has been silent this entire time, but it's finally his turn to speak. "All right, I gotta ask you a tough-hitting question," he says. "You can duck it if you want." Surely, he's ready to discuss the "war on Christmas," or the dangers of atheism, or anything else that Palin wrote between the first and last pages. "Real tree or artificial tree?" Kilmeade says. Real, Palin confirms.
"Do you cut it down yourself?" Hasselbeck chimes in, running out the clock for another few seconds.
And that's it. The interview wraps up. The Fox & Friends hosts have successfully conducted an interview about a book that all three had merely pretended to have read. Which should not be seen as an insult to Sarah Palin, because, after all, it was a book.