Pope Francis: World’s Worst Bouncer

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"In addition to having worked sweeping floors and running tests in a chemical laboratory as a teenager, Pope Francis revealed he also used to work as a bouncer." — Catholic News Service, December 2, 2013.

Pope: Come in, please! All are welcome!

[Teens stream into nightclub.]

Club Owner: Look, uh, Jorge, is it? I know it's your first day, but you need to be a little more discerning about who you let in to the club. We're going for an "exclusive, V.I.P."-type vibe, and I'm seeing a lot of poorly dressed losers in here. Also a number of lepers.

Pope: Is not all of mankind deserving of respect? The street urchin and the nobleman alike are equally blessed by the Lord's grace.

Club Owner: You're fired. 

Pope: Yup, okay.