Abandoned Baby in Duffle Bag Actually Three Huge Snakes

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A concerned citizen alerted police to a moving bag on the sidewalk in Boerum Hill today only to learn a lesson about jumping to conclusions. "The person who called it in apparently thought it was an abandoned baby," a source told the Post, but it turned out to be three snakes "in excess of 4 feet long." In some ways, the world is more evil than you even could have imagined.