The vice president stormed into the U.S. locker room after last night’s glorious win against Ghana and right away everyone was overdosing on good vibes.
To coach Jurgen Klinsmann: “He looked happier in that first goal — you can see it on the monitor — than the night I won the election.” (Note to future historians: Joe Biden won the election.)
“Are you kidding me? This is a kick, man.” Soccer!
To DaMarcus Beasley, with whom he apparently had some kind of long-standing bet: “I owe the drinks!”
To goalie Tim Howard: “Hey, Timmy! You played one hell of a game.”
“Things are great. Things are great. Better today.”
Back to Beasley: “Hey, man, anytime you want to collect. I owe ya.”
To anyone and everyone: “Hahahahaha [smiles with teeth.]”
Now how about a hug for Uncle Joe?