Welcome back to the New York Magazine Competition. On alternate Mondays, we lay out a challenge and offer a sample responses. Enter in the comments section, or on Twitter with the hashtag we've provided, and the editors will select a winner. Criteria are highly subjective, but heavily retweeted and favorited posts will have an advantage. The prize is a year's subscription to New York in print or a two-year subscription to the iPad edition (winner's choice). Full rules are here.
COMPETITION NO. 29: ANCIENT SEINFELD. Please supply a line or scenario from a very early Seinfeld episode. For example:
“Seize him! Giddyap!”
“We Hebrew slaves, the rest of us,
seek to attend the Feast of Festivus.”
“No primordial soup for you!”
“Her face could launch a thousand ships. But her man-hands …”
Enter in the comments thread on nymag.com’s Daily Intelligencer, or on Twitter with the hashtag #ancientseinfeld, by September 3.
RESULTS OF COMPETITION NO. 28: MOVIES WITH DESSERT, in which you were asked for a title that might make filmgoers want a treat.
HONORABLE MENTION TO:
The Mallomars Men
Cat on a Hot Fudge Sundae
My Best Friend’s Pudding
He’s Just Not That Into Yoo-hoo
Planet of the Crepes
Mr. Holland’s Donuts
Guess Who’s Staying for Dessert
À bout de soufflé
Almost Famous Amos
What About Babka?
A Clockwork Orange Julius
Mr. Smith Goes to Washington; Leaves After Discovering They Have No Dunkin’ Donuts
Little Shop of Ho Ho’s
Rosemary’s Baby Ruth
The Malt in Our Stars
The Eclair Strikes Back
Return of the Jello
The Phantom Mentos
Love in the Time of Coffeecake
AND THE WINNER IS:
Bob and Carol and Ben and Jerry