Bronx Man Decapitates Himself in Public

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NEW YORK, NY - AUGUST 22:  Crime scene tape at the funeral for former "Bachelor" contestant Gia Allemand at Trinity Grace Church on August 22, 2013 in New York, New York. Allemand passed away on Wednesday, August 14th of an apparent suicide.  (Photo by Rob Kim/Getty Images)
Photo: Rob Kim/Getty Images

You may have thought September would free us from the all-time awfulness of August, but it’s more of the same so far: The Daily News reports on a “spectacularly gruesome suicide” in Hunts Point on Monday in which a 51-year-old man managed to remove his own head, outdoors, around 9:30 a.m. According to police, Tomas Rivera “tied a chain from his head to a pole, then hit the gas on his 2005 Honda CRV.” He “gunned it … slamming into a parked vehicle,” his head left behind on the street. Rivera died at the scene. Jesus.