Tesla’s New Model D Is Not a Self-Driving Car

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Elon Musk, CEO of Tesla Motors, speaks at a press conference at the Nevada State Capitol, September 4, 2014 in Carson City, Nevada.
Photo: Max Whittaker/Getty Images

Tesla CEO Elon Musk unveiled the long-awaited Tesla “D” on Thursday night, and it is not, as many predicted, a self-driving car. According to USA Today, who broke the news hours before the event began (the article has since been removed), the new car is basically just a souped-up, all-wheel-drive version of the company’s existing Model S sedan, with the added ability to accelerate from 0 to 60 mph in 3.2 seconds, making it among the fastest-accelerating sedans ever. While not totally driverless, the D does come equipped with certain intelligent driver-assist features, such as sensors that enable it to detect traffic and, if safe, to change lanes automatically when the turn signal is activated, as well as onboard cameras that allow the car to read speed-limit signs and adjust speed accordingly. A little anti-climactic, admittedly, but at least we’ll always have our D jokes.