On the Bright Side, This Doctor Hasn’t Seen an Outbreak of Snowball Injuries

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Photo: Andrew Gombert/Corbis

This February has likely been the coldest one that New York City has seen since 1934. According to NBC New York, this month’s weather is currently competing with 1895, when the average temperature was 24.1 degrees. The age of frozen-slush puddles and wishing you didn’t forget your mittens is not over, either, as blustery weather has made plans to extend its stay in New York through this weekend.

On the bright side, the New York Times interviewed a doctor in Brooklyn who says he has not seen an outbreak in snowball injuries — or worse — as a result of the snow. “I don’t know that I’ve seen any snowball lacerations this year, but we get them. And I haven’t seen any icicle stabbings.” On the not-so-bright side, his hospital has admitted patients recovering from sledding accidents, heart attacks caused by shoveling snow, slipping on the ice, and “psychiatric issues linked to the cold.”

Local news stations have been running depressing segments advising those at risk for seasonal affective disorder, or SAD, to stay near windows whenever possible, and making locals feel even worse by talking to tourists from England, who haven’t seen weather like this since they visited Lapland.