Capitol Police No Longer Want People to Celebrate Freedom by Almost Falling Off Balconies

By
Fireworks explode in the sky above the Washington Monument and the U.S. Capitol, as a U.S. flag is seen in the foreground, while the nation celebrates its 229th birthday July 4, 2005 in Washington, DC. Hundreds of thousands of people took part to celebrate the anniversary of the adoption of the Declaration of Independence in the nation's capital which concluded with the largest fireworks display in the area.  (Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images)
We, the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, ensure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liquids to ourselves and our posterity.Photo: Alex Wong/Getty Images

CNN reports that congressional law-enforcement officials are sick of dealing with all the "coolers containing liquids" and the general bad behavior those liquids cause at Memorial Day and Fourth of July festivities at the Capitol.

These holiday concert receptions have grown more popular (and rowdier) in recent years, and the Capitol Police have given out a lot of overtime to try to manage the Dionysian revelry. It has not been easy; CNN notes that “there have been falls and injuries that were blamed on excessive drinking, according to a congressional source who said there was a near fall from a balcony that could have been catastrophic.” Law-enforcement officials sent congressional leaders a letter earlier this month saying that this year’s invite list should be far more exclusive.

And in case you were wondering how coolers containing liquids could cause so much mayhem, CNN adds that “‘liquids’ is a euphemism for alcohol, according to the multiple congressional sources.”