It Is Never Going to Be Warm Again

By
Image
Photo: Andrew Burton/Getty Images

When was the last time you stepped outside in a non-winter jacket? What do New York’s parks look like when the trees aren’t frozen skeletons? Do you remember when “going outside” was an activity you enjoyed and not something you had to endure with gritted teeth while getting from the subway to work? No, you don’t, because it’s been cold for the last million years and it’s going to continue to be cold for a bajillion more.

We made it through Friday’s fun little spring snowstorm, but there’s no light at the end of the tunnel: Today’s high is 41 degrees; tomorrow’s high is 47 degrees. On Wednesday, it will be slightly warmer (high 50s), but since it’s supposed to rain all day, it won’t count. By the weekend, we’re back to the mid-40s, obliterating any plans you had for enjoyable outdoor activities. It is literally never going to be warm again.

Next week it’s supposed to be sunny and in the 50s, so we can reevaluate our definition of “never” then.