Kentucky Governor Uses Jedi Mind Tricks to Defend Gay-Marriage Ban

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Governor BeshearPhoto: Douglas Graham/Getty Images

On Tuesday, the governor of Kentucky floated a creative new defense of the state’s gay-marriage ban: It’s not discriminatory, because nobody can have a same-sex marriage, not even straight people! Hmmm, that’s a new one.

In a brief filed with the U.S. Supreme Court, Governor Steve Beshear argued through his lawyer that Kentucky’s ban on same-sex marriages is non-discriminatory because “men and women, whether heterosexual or homosexual, cannot marry persons of the same sex.” Whoa, he’s really got you there, gay-marriage advocates.

Incidentally, according to the Courier-Journal, it’s the same logically twisted argument Virginia made 50 years ago in its attempt to uphold a ban on interracial marriage. Fifty years from now, once Millennials have effectively wiped out homophobia, we expect some southern governor to make the same argument about human-robot marriage.