Is It Boring to Wonder Just How Boring the Democratic Debate Will Be?

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Young couple fallen asleep in front of tv
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The September GOP debate was the most-watched primary debate in history – with some 24 million people tuning in. How can the Democrats compete without Holocaust references, frequent use of the word illegals, and Carly Fiorina’s baby-brain-harvesting fantasies?

This genteel policy roundtable will feature a manageable number of candidates, without many personal attacks. Which leaves the Twittering classes in agreement that this will be no fun at all. (What’s the emoji for no fun?)

The event, hosted at Wynn Las Vegas, will air tonight at 8:30 p.m. on CNN. A round-up of predictions:

Democratic debate will be substantive, but “sleepy.”
The most action we can expect are some more awkward high-fives.

CNN expects no one to watch.
Since it’ll be boring, and also there are two important baseball playoff games.

Will Hillary and Bernie be mean to each other, please?
“With no candidate calling his rivals losers or idiots, will viewers stay glued to their seats?”

Trump is already expected to be the best part of the debate.
He’ll be live-tweeting what he predicts will be “a very boring two hours.”

Mary Tyler Moore special is on during the debate.
PBS is offering a one-hour debate alternative. You know, in case you’re bored.

CNN is reserving a podium for Joe Biden.
Please come, Joe … it’ll be boring without you.

There will be three candidates we don’t know much about.
What a “snoozefest.”

CNN replaced Jake Tapper with Anderson Cooper as debate host.
If Clinton and Sanders don’t attract an audience, maybe Anderson’s silver-haired allure can.