John Oliver Thinks Pennies Are Stupid and Basically Complete Garbage

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One of the only things that pennies are actually good for — some Americans admit that they just throw the nearly worthless currency away instead of storing them in their pockets, where they will waste away and be forgotten — is making wishes in fountains.

However, as John Oliver pointed out on Last Week Tonight’s second-season finale, they would have to be small wishes, like, “I wish, somewhere in the world, a mouse has a good day,” or “I wish I knew what a penny looked like underwater.”

Since no one would care about the penny disappearing — except for the Lincoln Presidential Library — Oliver says it’s time to say good-bye. “There are certain things we know are impossible to get rid of: terrorism, herpes, and Guy Fieri,” he concluded. “But the penny is a nuisance we can actually do something about. So let’s do it, America.”