Woods: Hello, senator.
Cruz: It’s nice to finally get in touch. I feel like we have a lot in common.
Woods: Do you love this country?
Cruz: Do I! I love it so much.
Woods: Because I love this country.
Cruz: I really love this country.
Woods: That’s incredible. It’s like I’m talking to myself.
Cruz: I just love it so much.
Woods: So much.
Cruz: Do you ever wish you could marry this country, but then you worry it would weaken the sanctity of marriage?
Cruz: This is so refreshing
Woods: What do you love the most about this country?
Cruz: The people. The food. The, uh …
Woods: The film industry.
Woods: Freedom. The Second Amendment.
Cruz: Yes! And … Hot dogs. Baseball.
Woods: This is making me so enthusiastic about your candidacy.
Cruz: [Pause] The mountains. Purple mountains.
Woods: Are they really purple? Because I’ve …
Cruz: Oil. Coal.
Woods: What else?
Cruz: The, um, highways, which we should privatize.
Woods: No other country has highways like that.
Cruz: [Glances at watch] So are you thinking of endors—
Woods: I feel like we’ve just started skimming the surface of this topic. When you say you love this country, do you mean …