Cow That Really Didn’t Want to Get Eaten Escapes From Slaughterhouse in Queens

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RIP, Bessie.

Once again, a cow’s bid for freedom has been cut tragically short. According to an NYPD spokesperson, a runaway cow was first spotted on Jamaica Avenue and Merrick Boulevard in Jamaica, Queens, at about 12:45 p.m. Thursday — it had reportedly escaped from Archer Halal Live Poultry, a nearby slaughterhouse, in an attempt to once again feel fresh grass beneath its cloven hooves. 

It got as far as a parking garage at Archer Avenue and 135th Street before it was captured, bound by officers of the 103rd Precinct, and dragged into what appeared to be a livestock trailer.

All officers safe,” the police reported via Twitter. “No injuries.” But can the same be said of the cow, particularly as it goes back to its old life?

Officers in the 103rd have a surprising depth of experience when it comes to recapturing livestock. In May 2009 an equally desperate cow escaped from another slaughterhouse in the same area (it now lives in a wildlife sanctuary), and today’s escape comes just two days after they successfully ensnared a goat. That poor cow never stood a chance.

The goat was returned to its owner, but the fate of this most recent escapee is less certain. Will it be pardoned and adopted, like the cow that escaped from a New Jersey slaughterhouse in 2012? Or will it go straight back to the chopping block like another of its New Jersey cousins? Either way, if it had really wanted to give cops a run for their money, the cow should’ve learned from the llamas.