Just as the recently retired conservative Georgia Democrat made it tough for his party to get the most from a close Senate margin in 2001, the vindicated Lieberman will return to exact some payback when the Dems take five seats and get within striking distance of actually having a voice in the chamber. Lieberman, once en route to the political dustbin, will trounce antiwar billionaire Ned Lamont and return to D.C. to prove that "ending the partisan tone in Washington" really means wringing a little sweat from the old friends who left you cold.
The Pirros are no more.
Jeanine and Bernie Kerik get hitched in Aruba, and her heartbroken ex-husband gets NY1's first-ever reality show, Al's Money, in which hopeful female contestants vie to be the lady who wins his hand in marriage.
No one wants to be comptroller when they grow up.
It's been a tough year for a man with the job no one knew existed, but Alan Hevesi will win by double digits only to be replaced in January by a comptroller who pursues a Hevesian approach without the ethical slips-ups (or at least not the terrible timing).
Hillary will begin her presidential run tomorrow night wearing …
The light-blue suit. No cross but, in a daring flourish, a tiny pentagram earring that goes undetected by the assembled press.
If John Sweeney wins …
He will pledge to "knock Nancy Pelosi around Congress."
If Tom Reynolds wins …
All the children in Eerie County will surround him and sing a disarmingly beautiful chorus of "We Are the World."
Chris Callaghan will be the happiest man in New York tomorrow.
He was the Republican Party's second choice to lose the comptroller's race (No. 1, Scott Vanderhoef, ended up being John Faso's running mate), he lacks the experience or skill to do the job, and when he returns to his old gig as Saratoga County treasurer, they will have a little party with punch and a cake. They will sing "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow." He will smile and nod and make a little toast. When he goes back to his desk, he will pick up the phone and call his wife and say, "Honey, I'm home."
Alan Hevesi will be the saddest man in New York.
He will rent the largest stretch limo available in New York (chauffer included), with a hot tub and a D.J. in the back. He will have it driven through the front door of the Sheraton Hotel and into the ballroom, right into the middle of a party of victorious Democrats that uninvited him. He will emerge through the sunroof in his swimming trunks and pronounce through a bullhorn, "Endorse this, ya bitches!"