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world cup

HOLY SHINOLAS, PEOPLE: THE UNITED STATES JUST WON

If the United States ever ends up becoming the next big soccer power — as some soccer sociologists predict they will — historians will note what just happened in the United States–Algeria game as the point when Americans truly embraced the game. In an astounding, everyone-in-your-office-is-screaming-at-once moment, Landon Donovan put in a stoppage-time goal to beat Algeria 1–0 to win Group C. The United States spent the entire game attacking and just missing ... until Donovan's breakthrough. England finishes second in Group C with their 1–0 win over Slovenia. It is the greatest moment in U.S. soccer history by a rather wide margin. The U.S. will play the Group D runner-up at 2:30 on Saturday, so start making your drinking plans right now. The U.S. just scored a stoppage-time goal to go from missing the knockout round to winning the group. THAT TOTALLY IS SOMETHING THAT JUST OCCURRED. We are going to go out into the street and start randomly kissing people now.

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Photo: Tomothy A. Clary/AFP/Getty Images