The Jets played a football game yesterday and they lost and there was all sorts of circus idiocy that pops up every time that dumb team plays. We don't have the energy to play any of that straight today, and we sure as hell enjoy our lives too much to have actually watched the game, so let's just recite the ten takeaways and move on with our Christmas Eve, okay?
1. The Jets lost to the Chargers 27–17, even though the Chargers are about to fire their coach and seem to want their season over as badly as the Jets do.
2. Greg McElroy started and took every snap. The best thing you can say about McElroy is that he is still alive. He was sacked eleven` times, and we're pretty sure, by the end of the game, his publicity mugshot had a black eye on it.
3. Neither Mark Sanchez nor Tim Tebow played a single snap. Considering how McElroy was knocked around, they were both probably pretty happy about this.
4. Tebow didn't even show up with the punt team, even though both he and Sanchez were active and listed as co-No. 2 on the depth chart. Because heaven forbid either one of those guys be offended by their depth chart listing. It might lead to locker room discord!
5. According to several reports, Tebow asked coach Rex Ryan early last week not to put him in any of the wildcat packages. He's angry that McElroy has passed him on the depth chart. We understand that, actually, but again: Had Tebow played yesterday instead of McElroy, he might not be walking today.
6. With one throw, Jeremy Kerley — who took over for Tebow as the wildcat quarterback — passed Tebow's total passing yardage for the season. That's right: Tim Tebow, Heisman Trophy winner, global icon, playoff-game-winning quarterback ... is fourth on the Jets in passing yards this year.
7. McElroy will start next week against the Bills. Hey, why not?
8. A bunch of players decided not to be interviewed after the game. Journalists always get so fired up about this, but honestly, we wouldn't want to sit there and have people just ask us mean questions either. We know it's an obligation, and it shows little respect for the profession ... but this is still the Jets and we assure you that the reporters are ready to get this over with as much as the players are.
9. This is all finally, mercifully over next week.
10. Sorry, we could only make it to nine.