Kudos to the Daily News' "Confidenti@l" blog for pursuing the stories that matter. They encountered Alex Rodriguez at a toy drive in Miami and sought clarification on the long-disputed Us Weekly report that A-Rod has portraits of himself as a centaur hanging above his bed. We need answers, closure. We got none of the above.

Confidenti@l inquired about the paintings and got the following response (found via the Cut 4 blog):

“No, I do not have a painting of my upper body on a Minotaur,” he told Confidenti@l at a toy drive over the weekend. “I don’t know where they get that stuff.”

Okay, fair enou—WAIT, hold the phone. A minotaur? I paid attention during the mythology unit in fourth grade and know that a minotaur is a man's body with a bull's head on top. They live in labyrinths. A painting of A-Rod's upper body on a minotaur's lower body (i.e., a man's lower body) would just be a painting of A-Rod. And you know what? I bet he's got a regular old painting of himself lying around somewhere. That's a lie.

A painting of A-Rod's torso on the body of a horse, which is what a centaur is? Jury's still out. Well evaded, A-Rod.