1. Now that weekend crowds have dissipated, check out the new Richard Prince: Spiritual America exhibit at the Guggenheim.
2. Gossip hounds beeline to Barnes & Noble for free-verse provocatrix Rosie O’Donnell’s dishy Celebrity Detox. Or put it this way: Autograph hounds /queue up / dreaming of Trump slams / yearning for justice.
3. It’s Wednesday night out there, but the weekend in your mind, so groove to tracks from the album A Weekend in the City, performed by limey rockers Bloc Party at the WaMu Theater.
4. Nonagenarian cabaret legend Marta Eggerth channels the glamour of Edith Piaf and Lotte Lenya at Café Sabarsky.
5. Hollywood breaks out the big guns: George Clooney plays a conscience-racked corporate fixer in the brainy thriller Michael Clayton, while the Farrelly brothers reunite with Ben Stiller for a raunchy remake of Elaine May’s The Heartbreak Kid.
6. Check out Open House New York, a tour of the city’s best architecture. At night, watch Plácido Domingo conducting Roméo et Juliette at the Met.
7. Deborah Gibson (of the eighties’ Electric Youth and nineties Broadway comeback) brings her brassy best to B.B. King’s.
8. At the Museum of the City of New York, Mary Kent presents her book Salsa Talks!, accompanied by musicians Zon del Barrio.
9. The Khmer Arts Ensemble reimagines The Magic Flute via dance, and set in ancient Angkor, in Pamina Devi at the Joyce.
10. The National Theatre of Greece returns to N.Y. City Center with Electra, the world’s greatest tale of matricide aside from Psycho. Directed by German master Peter Stein.
11. Exhausted by the highbrow? Find out if Mel Brooks can strike gold twice, as Young Frankenstein goes into previews for its November 8 opening.
12. Elizabeth: The Golden Age, the sequel to Blanchett’s Oscar nod as the Virgin Queen, opens, with Clive Owen—as Sir Walter Raleigh!—sexing things up. Meanwhile, in Lars and the Real Girl, Ryan Gosling moons over an inflatable doll, under the sympathetic gaze of Emily “Avian-Bone Syndrome” Mortimer and Patricia Clarkson.
13. Hail to the King: Cyrus Chestnut Trio plays the Elvis Presley Songbook at the Miller Theatre.
14. H. H. the Dalai Lama at Radio City Music Hall, where he’ll discuss “Peace and Prosperity” for a mere $25. Dress code: serene.
15. Monday-night boozers pour into the meatpacking district for Rum Fest New York City, an orgy of cane-based rhums, rums, and cachaças, at Valbella restaurant. BYO Coke.
16. Uncategorizable Russian-born chanteuse Regina Spektor brings her anti-folk piano rock to Hammerstein Ballroom.
17. The Emperor’s Children author Claire Messud discusses her hit 2006 novel—and indie crush Hope Davis reads an excerpt!—at Symphony Space.
18. Major Klimt exhibition opening at the Neue Galerie.
19. Ben Affleck directs Gone Baby Gone, a Boston crime novel by Dennis “Mystic River” Lehane. (Manly catharsis alert!) Or catch Sydney Lumet’s Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead with Philip Seymour Hoffman and Ethan Hawke as brothers.
20. Take the B/D to the Bronx, where the New York Botanical Garden’s lush kikus (Japanese chrysanthemums) are in bloom.
21. Quasi-rehabilitated former horsey girls flock to MSG to see the World Famous Lipizzaner Stallions—like Cirque du Soleil, but muskier.
22. For 40 years, Leon Fleisher was the world’s master of works for the left hand. (Heh-heh. Sorry.) Now that Botox injections have restored the use of his right, he’ll bring his two-handed repertoire to Carnegie Hall for a master class.
23. The American Ballet Theatre celebrates a decade at New York City Center with a zippy season of performances ranging from Twyla Tharp to George Balanchine to Agnes de Mille to Lar Lubovitch.
24. First day of the World Series. Program DVR and snacks accordingly. Dress code: Oscar Madison.
25.To satisfy that cool-weather yearning for actual literature, pick up a copy of Due Considerations, John Updike’s musings on Orhan Pamuk, Muriel Spark, and the sinking of the Lusitania. Add hot cider, cozy window seat.
26. Danish director Susanne Bier—of last year’s sleeper hit After the Wedding—directs the very pretty love triangle formed by Halle Berry, Benicio Del Toro, and David Duchovny in Things We Lost in the Fire. Plus: Drive-By Truckers at the Bowery Ballroom.
27. Don’t you need more Brit-hip-hop-cum-funk, double-Dutch chants, and exclamation points in your life?! Yes?!? Then follow The Go! Team to Bowery Ballroom.
28. MoMA opens Georges Seurat: The Drawings. Bone up and prepare for January, when Sunday in the Park With George goes into previews.
29. Tom Stoppard’s Rock ’n’ Roll smashed box-office records in the West End last year. The original stars—the sublime Brian Cox, Sinéad Cusack, and Rufus Sewall—arrive at the Bernard B. Jacobs Theatre, and it’s the last week for you to catch it in previews. Beg, borrow, or steal tickets.
30. The new Backstreet Boys release their new album. Must. Repair. Time. Machine.
31. Halloween. From 4 to 7 p.m., the Museum of Natural History offers a kid-friendly alternative to Village decadence. At 7:30, leave kids with the babysitter and attend a party dressed in assless chaps.