The Lawn-Squatter’s Guide to Summer Festivals
Lyrics Worth Memorizing
Best Reference to Shamed TLC Programming:
“They thought I laid dead, I was playing possum / Spot me everywhere with the eight like Kate Gosselin.”
Pusha-T, “Money on My Mind”
Best Use of the Word ‘Brunch’:
“Have emcees over my house and fix ’em brunch / But you rappers? We goin’ out, goin’ dutch.”
Beastie Boys Featuring Nas, “Too Many Rappers”
Most Encompassing of Every Person on the Planet:
“People on computers / People in the park / Everywhere I go / From Ohio to Zanzibar.”
Ke$ha, “Tease Me”
Most Adorable Homicide:
“Rum bum bum bum / Rum bum bum bum / Rum bum bum bum / Man down.”
Rihanna, “Man Down”
Best Use of Unhip Anatomy:
“So posh, nails fierce with the gold gloss / Which means nobody getting over me / I got the swag, and it’s pumping out my ovaries.”
Kreayshawn, “Gucci Gucci”
Photos: Rafa Rivas/AFP/Getty Images (Smith); Michael Loccisano/FilmMagic/Getty Images (Santigold); Wendell Teodoro/WireImage/Getty Images (Van Buuren); John Sommers II/Getty Images for American Express (Badu); Tim Mosenfelder/WireImage/Getty Images (Bright Eyes)