• Marquee Third Anniversary celebration. 289 Tenth Ave., nr. 27th St., 11 p.m. Marquee has a bad rap because of the Hilton-Lohan factor, but the general vibe and bathroom-line conversation are considerably less smug and/or date rape-y than your average Murray Hill bar. Still, God willing, tonight will degenerate into some sort of tabloid-tastic, coked-out skank brawl for the ages.
• Guggenheim Young Collectors’ Council ball. Guggenheim Museum, 1071 Fifth Ave., nr. 89th St., 7:30 p.m. Hosted by Roberta Armani. Expected guests include Mary J. Blige, Usher, Kim Catrall, and Ivanka Trump. A post-gala dinner starts at nine; given what’s going on at Marquee, expect some furtive checking of watches around eleven.
• Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year party. Skylight Studios, 275 Hudson St., nr. Dominick St., 8 p.m. Dwayne Wade of the Miami Heat is the aforementioned sportsman and will appear via satellite. Expected in-person guests are Bob Costas, Bill Russell, and Mariano Rivera. But since “sportsman” is typically used as a euphemism for “someone who shoots animals,” why not make Wade “athlete” of the year?
Or, check out all our Agenda listings for tonight, selected by New York’s culture editors.