Top Chef viewers who dealt with their postpartum depression last night by mooning around Bravo hoping for another toque or two before things were truly cashed found themselves suddenly facing an entirely different kind of high. Coming up next was the premiere of Bravo’s new Top Design, in which Todd Oldham wannabes remake rooms for a chance at some start-up cash and a place in a top interior-design firm. The new show, it seems, will stick to the standard reality formula: early ejection of boring contestants, the establishment of a villain (oodles of possible Marcels, don’t worry), and a new mentor and host in Oldham himself. But that, sadly, is the show’s big problem: Oldham’s wooden delivery was in desperate need of some hot Tim Gunn glue. (How Top Chef’s Padma was allowed to sound half-asleep all the time, we’ll never know.) Which gives us, suddenly, the perfect idea for the next reality show: So You Want to Be a Reality-Show Host. And sorry, Todd, you’ve got some talent, but we just don’t think you’ve got the stage presence to be an idol.
“Send her home!”
Crowd now full chanting “SEND HER BACK!”