An alert reader sent us along his very own invitation to be on The Bachelor. ‘“Apparently they are randomly spamming New York lawyers,” says our spy, who works at a top-ten firm. Casting directors are looking for someone “who is successful, good-looking, has an out-going personality, is ready to settle down, is around 6 ft tall and, usually, is between 27 to 36 years of age.” Guess you’re shit outta luck, shorties! “We’ve never had an attorney be ‘The Bachelor’ so we are definitely looking to go that route,” the e-mail admits. The producers seem to know a little bit about the law profession — specifically, that good catches are harder to find than you’d think. So they’re casting their net wide and offering $5,000 reward to anyone who finds an attorney who could make the show. But though they know a bit about lawyers, it’s clearly not enough. Here’s the last line of the e-mail: “Please DO NOT forward to the press. We try to make this part of the process as private as possible.” Silly casting agents! Don’t you know that 50 percent of all law firms’ billable hours are spent forwarding private e-mails?