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We’ve been learning a lot about the Yankees off-the-field lives this season. For example, we know that Kyle Farnsworth is both a master baker and an expert Big Buck Hunter player. And we’ve learned that A-Rod can’t handle the sight of childbirth. But a Portfolio story on Jason Giambi officially strays into Too Much Information territory. Giambi, the article says, lives his life by the motto “Party like a rock star, hammer like a porn star, rake like an all-star.” And arguably, that’s not the grossest part. We’ll let writer Franz Lidz explain:
The deepest, darkest secret harbored by the New York Yankees first baseman is that whenever he is in a prolonged hitting funk, he wears a gold lamé, tiger-stripe thong under his uniform.
Now, a quick look at Giambi’s output the last few years would seem to indicate that he’s been wearing that thong pretty much nonstop since 2003. But no! He occasionally lends it to teammates — including current Yanks Derek Jeter, Johnny Damon, and Robinson Cano — to help them break out of their slumps. Giambi says it “works every time,” which makes us think two things: One, nobody can ever again claim these Yankees are too highly paid to be close-knit — for goodness sake, they’re sharing thongs! And two, if this thing really works, why not thongs for everybody! When you’re in last place, what do you have to lose? —Joe DeLessio
Bronx Cheer [Portfolio]
