Mischa Barton Is on Mental Lockdown

The “medical issue” for which the LAPD removed Mischa Barton from her home on Wednesday has landed The O.C.’s former starlet in the psych ward of Ceders-Sinai Medical Center under Section 5150 of the California Welfare & Institutions Code, which enables authorities to hold someone for up to 72 hours if that person presents a danger to him- or herself or others. “Page Six” decided to tell Michael Lohan about Hustler’s porno film spoofing his daughter Lindsay, who tried to be Marilyn Monroe (again) for the August issue of Spanish Vogue. Britney Spears is supposedly dating her agent, but she’s been spending weekends alone with her record producer. Apparently, she goes only for guys on her payroll. After filming a French Schweppes ad with Nicole Kidman, 9-year-old Slumdog Millionaire star Rubina Ali said Kidman, who barely exited her trailer, is “strange” and “afraid of the sun.”

Dan Rather and Eliot Spitzer dined at ‘21’ while Lloyd Blankfein celebrated Goldman’s earnings with State Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver at Prime Grill. Hearst is “quietly shopping around for candidates” to replace Pamela Fiori at Town & Country. Orlando Bloom’s house was robbed of $500,000 worth of cash, jewelry, and a rare $250,000 Rolex watch. Madonna cried when the rigging collapsed on her stadium stage in Marseille, France, killing two of her stagehands. Apparently Michael Jackson’s body was not in the coffin at his funeral. Brüno has been banned from the Ukraine, with the Culture Ministry claiming that the film would “damage the morality of Ukranian citizens.”

Zac Efron is channeling Aquaman in preparation for his upcoming movie, The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud. Bethenny Frankel’s reported solo Bravo show, Skinny & the City, might have some trouble getting past skinnyandthecity.com founder Tanya Zuckerbrot, who’s in talks with corporate attorneys over Frankel’s brand theft. Meanwhile, an insider says that no deals have been signed between Frankel and Bravo. Kevin Connolly partied at the Gramercy Park Hotel. Jessica Alba grabbed drinks at Schiller’s with DJ Logic. Jon Gosselin’s 22-year-old girlfriend (the daughter of the plastic surgeon who performed Kate’s free tummy tuck) is bisexual. Serena Williams and hip-hopper Common were canoodling in Central Park when a pedicab driver and wannabe French rapper tried to slip Common his CD. And Jennifer Aniston bought $1,000 worth of lingerie at Only Hearts on Mott Street. Maybe she and Gerard Butler really are getting it on.