the sports section

Can We Call a Moratorium on Talking About A-Rod’s Junk?

Roughly one year ago, during the crazy Summer of Madonna-Rod, a gossip columnist speculated (not unconvincingly) that Alex Rodriguez’s season-interrupting groin injury was exacerbated by the amorous attentions of the pop star. Then, as we were inundated with more and more dish about his proclivities (well-built athletic types), and as he switched from Madonna to Bethenny Frankel to Kate Hudson, focus on his junk heightened. TMZ gathered photographic evidence of the amplitude of his endowment. Now that he’s settled down for a bit with Hudson, we thought we were free to ponder other packages, like Lady Gaga’s. But now in comes Cindy Adams with some surprisingly graphic intel: “Now, having seen Alex up close, I can tell you exactly about his face. Never having shared a urinal with him, I cannot tell you about his other varying parts. I am now told, however — and reliably so — that there are reasons he scores big in RBIs.” Grandma, you too? Please, enough is enough.

LOFTY GOAL FOR WHOOPI GOLDBERG [NYP via Gawker]

Can We Call a Moratorium on Talking About A-Rod’s Junk?