Yesterday, President and cutting edge medical expert Barack Obama introduced the world to its newest political malady: Romnesia. Patient Zero: Mitt Romney. Symptoms: Flip-flopping, Etch-a-Sketch-ing, and other expected campaign behavior. And the non-fatal condition may already be spreading, says Vice-President Joe Biden, who told a crowd in Fort Pierce, Florida yesterday that he thinks he may have discovered a second case:
I hope you all don’t get Romnesia! It’s a bad disease, it’s a bad disease. And it’s contagious, because all of a sudden, Paul Ryan, the budget hawk — the guy who introduced a whole budget plan that actually already … passed the House of Representatives … all of a sudden, he doesn’t remember it.
Are we talking a political epidemic here? Has anyone heard from the CDC? Or the FEC, for that matter? Should we all be running in the streets panicking?
No, says Mitt Romney, who appeared to be in perfect health at a rally in Daytona Beach last night, where he stood onstage in front of a fake castle pitching to a crowd of tattoo-toting bikers (there for Biketoberfest) — as well as some nearby drunk Bubba Gump Shrimp revelers, BuzzFeed noticed. In fact, the Republican presidential candidate had a diagnosis of his own to share.
They’ve been reduced to petty attacks and silly word games. Just watch. The Obama campaign has become the incredible shrinking campaign.
First Romnesia, and now the Incredible Shrinking Disease. Truly, this whole election business has started to threaten America’s collective health.