While we’re not familiar with the protocol for getting rid of an unwanted taxidermied deer, it seems that dropping the thing in a garbage can is not the most considerate method, if only because it won’t really fit. This means that pedestrians who are just trying to have a normal day will be confronted with the creepy sight of a motionless ruminant mammal that appears to be sitting upright and staring at them as they make their way down the sidewalk. The ditched deer spotted by DNAinfo this morning in Washington Heights was especially terrifying, as it had “visible stitches down the front of its torso and screws where the antlers used to be.” The police were called to monitor the situation until the Department of Sanitation arrived to haul the formerly living creature away in a truck. We assume observers were almost as traumatized as they were when Bambi’s mom was shot.
“Send her home!”
Crowd now full chanting “SEND HER BACK!”