stand clear of the closing doors

Man Wearing Nothing But Sneakers Dozes, Swigs Jack Daniel’s on the Subway

It’s all in the title of the post, really. On Thursday night, the Daily Front Row’s Peter Davis stepped onto the E train and found a man, naked except for a pair of sneakers, dozing on a seat in between swigs from a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. Of course, Davis took a just-barely-safe-for-work photo and uploaded it to Twitter and Instagram (the latter quickly removed it for being “inappropriate material”).

That photo made the cover of Saturday’s New York Post, along with the pretty good headline, “Just another story in the naked city.” There were about 30 clothed commuters sharing the car with the guy, who rode for at least six stops. “He was just really drunk. He would swig it and then nod out. He must’ve taken four swigs in four stops,” said Davis. “He was oblivious. He kind of looked at me when I took the picture, but he didn’t seem to care.”

Though Davis concluded that the subject of his photo wasn’t homeless because “he didn’t smell bad and was sporting a fresh faux-hawk haircut,” the situation still seems more sad than funny, so we will not seriously ponder whether Naked Guy is worse than Subway-Pole-As-Thong Lady or whoever left that used condom on the F train. The MTA told the Post that it had “no information on the incident,” so let’s just hope this dude got it together and put on some clothes. It’s getting cold, after all.

Naked Guy Rides Subway