If you signed off the internet for a few hours on Thursday afternoon, maybe to transfer to a different device after briefly interacting with loved ones, you missed what we assume will be the shortest presidential campaign of the 2016 election. When asked if he would support Senator Ted Cruz’s presidential bid, Texas congressman Louie Gohmert told The Hill, “Ted is a good friend and would be an outstanding President; however, I haven’t ruled out an exploratory committee myself.” While this sent a thrill up the leg of every political journalist, sadly Jeb Bush & Co. will not be forced to debate a man who linked gun control to bestiality, warned that the U.S. was being infiltrated by “terror babies,” and argued for taking away Americans’ right to directly elect their senators.
A short time later, a Gohmert aide told the Texas Tribune he was just joking, citing baldness as the main reason he’ll never be elected president. “Washington D.C. contains too many who do not recognize statements made with a figurative tongue in cheek, sometimes known as being ironic,” said an email from Gohmert’s office. “To more completely describe his actual beliefs, Congressman Gohmert notes the Kennedy-Nixon debates created a line of demarcation beyond which television became the critical factor in being elected President which also meant there would be no more bald Presidents in his lifetime.”
He’s laughing now, but frankly, Gohmert’s a little offended that everyone took his 2016 bid seriously. He may believe some crazy things, but he’s not that crazy.
