jesus christie

Chris Christie’s Signed Gym Shorts for Sale on eBay

Chris Christie Holds Press Conference On Jobs And The Economy In Trenton
Just what you’ve always wanted: this guy’s gym shorts. Photo: Jeff Zelevansky/2016 Getty Images

Everyone’s favorite political hostage Chris Christie is hemorrhaging supporters after his endorsement of Donald Trump late last month. His New Jersey constituents are up in arms, and one ex-staffer says they’re so disillusioned that they put a treasured Christie memento up for auction: an autographed pair of the governor’s gym shorts. The “dark blue, heavy cotton” gym shorts read, “Stay in shape, best wishes Chris Christie Gov. NJ.” Bidding starts at $222.50, and so far 11 hopeful buyers have cast bids.

Sadly, the seller “cannot guarantee” that the shorts were ever worn by Christie, but “they probably were.” However, if a customer is unsatisfied with the lack of photo or video evidence — a shot of the governor, say, leading a Tae Bo workout sporting the shorts — they can request their money back. “Once-in-a-lifetime chance to own something unique,” the seller points out. “Soon the whole crazy mess will be over.” On the contrary, dear seller — the whole crazy mess has just begun.

Buy Chris Christie’s Signed Gym Shorts on eBay