I can’t believe I have to say this, but if you plan on driving 50 mph over the speed limit to get the perfect speedometer reading on Snapchat — which, by the way, you should absolutely, totally, definitely never do — and get pulled over, perhaps consider not admitting to doing it “for the Snapchat” when asked why you were in such a hurry by a police officer.
You would think this is common sense. Wrong. When a Georgia man was pulled over for driving an astounding 112 miles per hour on Tuesday, he took the time to remind us all that mankind still has a long way to go. When asked by a pair of cops why the hell he was doing nearly double the speed limit, Malon Neal told the officers at his window plain and simple: “Um, I was trying to do it for the Snapchat, not going to lie to you.”
Like any wildlife near the road that day, the officers were blown away by Neal’s candor. “Trying to what?” they asked. But, instead of replying with any semi-reasonable answer, Neal stuck to his guns: “Do it for the Snapchat,” he said, cementing his place in history. (And in the county jail.)
Neal was charged with reckless driving and immediately taken into custody. His arrest also resulted in one of the most Old-and-Perplexed-Police-Officer-esque sentences being included in the final incident report: “He then said he was driving in such a manner because he was attempting to take a picture using the SnapChat application on his phone” (poor capitalization choices definitely not mine).
Even the city’s Department of Public Safety’s Twitter account had something to say about the affair. And when you’re getting called out by the Alpharetta DPS on Twitter of all places, you know you’ve done something wrong.
Maybe in the next couple of weeks, Instagram Stories will release a speedometer feature so you can finally be caught being a dumbass in a hip, 2017-approved way.