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Everything You Don’t Want to Know About Your Kid’s Sex Life

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What the parents are saying...
All questions and answers

How old is your teenager?
13.....18 (8 boys, 10 girls)
14.....14 (7 boys, 7 girls)
15......10 (7 boys, 3 girls)
16......24 (11 boys, 13 girls)
17.....15 (7 boys, 8 girls)
18......19 (9 boys, 10 girls)

In your estimation, what percent of teens polled answered “bisexual” or “undecided” when asked about their sexual preference?
Bisexual......21.6% (parent average)
Undecided...24.3% (parent average)

“They’re more confused than undecided.”
Father of a 14-year-old boy

“Their old school had a lot of acting out, like gothic kids. About 10 percent thought they were bisexual.”
Mother of a 13-year-old girl

“I think it’s on the rise because there is so much lesbian stuff.”
Mother of a 13-year-old girl

Do you consider your child:
Straight.....95 (46 parents of boys, 49 parents of girls)
Bisexual..... 2 (2 parents of girls)
Gay.............. 1(1 parent of a boy)
Not sure...... 2(2 parents of boys)

“I can’t tell because of her age.”
Mother of a 15-year-old girl

“My older one said if he wasn’t [straight] he would tell me.”
Mother of a 16-year-old boy

“Super-straight. She’s so into boys it’s sick.”
Mother of a 13-year-old girl

“I hope he is straight. I assume he is.”
Mother of a 17-year-old boy

“Not sure. We are tolerant of him in the family.”
Mother of a 16-year-old boy

“My son is definitely straight. We have a gay relative and he doesn’t like him.”
mother of a 15-year-old boy

How old were you when you had sex for the first time?
12.........................................1 (1 dad)
13........................................6 (4 dads, 2 moms)
14........................................5 (4 dads, 1 moms)
15........................................5 (5 dads)
16........................................14 (8 dads, 6 moms)
17........................................20 (8 dads, 12 moms)
18........................................13 (7 dads, 6 moms)
19........................................7 (2 dads, 5 moms)
20........................................7 (1 dad, 6 moms)
21........................................2 (2 moms)
Over 21.............................9 (2 dads, 7 moms)
Waited for marriage...6 (1 dads, 5 moms)
No answer........................5 (3 dads, 2 moms)

Do you think your teen has had sex?
Yes........................26
Child’s age:
13 years old......0
14...........................1 (1 girl)
15...........................2 (2 boys)
16...........................7 (3 boys, 4 girls)
17...........................7 (3 boys, 4 girls)
18..........................9 (7 boys, 2 girls)

“Yes, he told me.”
Mother of a 15-year-old boy

“Yes, unfortunately. I’m not stupid.”
Father of a 17-year-old girl

No..........................66
Child’s age:
13 years old......17 (7 boys, 10 girls)
14...........................11 (5 boys, 6 girls)
15...........................8 (5 boys, 3 girls)
16..........................15 (7 boys, 8 girls)
17........................... 7 (3 boys, 4 girls)
18.......................... 8 (2 boys, 6 girls)
Don’t know..........8 (5 boys, 3 girls)

At what age is it appropriate for your child or any young person to have sex?
14..........................................................................1 (1 mom)
15..........................................................................1 (1 mom)
16..........................................................................10 (5 dads, 5 moms)
17..........................................................................15 (7 dads, 8 moms)
18..........................................................................26 (10 dads, 16 moms)
19..........................................................................12 (4 dads, 8 moms)
20..........................................................................6 (5 dads, 1 mom)
21..........................................................................4 (2 dads, 2 moms)
Over 21...............................................................3 (1 dad, 2 moms)
Wait for marriage.........................................5 ( 4 dads, 1 moms)
Never..................................................................2 (1 dad, 1 mom)
It’s individual, you can’t set an age...10 (6 dads, 4 moms)
When in a committed relationship........3 (3 moms)
No Answer........................................................2 (1 dad, 1 mom)

“Nineteen or 20, because they don’t pick good partners before then.”
Mother of a 13-year-old girl

“Nineteen. As long as it’s responsible, it’s okay. I try to have different rules for my kid’s sexuality than my own.”
Father of a 13-year-old boy

“Eighteen, because of the prom thing. They don’t tell you about it but it’s probably going to happen.”
Mother of a 15-year-old boy

“There isn’t an age. It’s individual.”
Mother of a 14-year-old girl

If your teen has never had sex, why not?
Parents/upbringing..............................................................4
Waiting for love....................................................................5
Religious reasons and/or waiting for marriage.....10
Not yet interested/too young..........................................30
Opportunity hasn’t presented itself.............................2
Waiting for the right person............................................9
Waiting for moral reasons...............................................1
Fear.............................................................................................5
Other...........................................................................................7
N/A and/or no answer.........................................................27

“He’s a little too immature.”
Father of a 13-year-old boy

“It grosses her out.”
Father of a 14-year-old girl

“She’s too young and she’s not in love.”
Mother of a 14-year-old girl

“My son is an atheist, but I hope he would wait until emotion and caring are involved.”
Father of a 14-year-old boy

“Because I keep him on a tight leash.”
Father of a 13-year-old boy

“Religion, community, and parenting.”
father of a 17-year-old girl

“I think it’s insecurity.”
father of a 15-year-old girl

What’s your take on teen sex overall?
“They’re going to have sex, so talk to them so they can make smart choices”
Mother of an 18-year-old boy

“Use protection, because ‘Just say no’ doesn’t work in reality”
Mother of a 13-year-old boy

“Nothing is appropriate. It’s about finding the right person, and you’re not going to find the right person at age 14. I was 32 when I lost my virginity”
Mother of a 14-year-old girl


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