Profile

This venue is closed.

Screw Mickey D's. We ought to sue the pants off Alan Harding before we burst another seam. At his kitschy new burger joint, he's created a kind of fantasy-junk-food camp for middle-aged Augustus Gloops. Just look at the evidence: the Schnäckie, Harding's take on the slider. Cute name. Only 1.5 ounces of freshly ground beef on a house-baked minibun. Seems harmless enough, right? Wrong. You'll want twelve, minimum. Need more proof? How about spicy fries, big fat onion rings, seven kinds of hot dogs and kielbasa, and a homemade Orange Julius for chrissakes? And Schnäck's Asian-inspired idea of diet food? Crazy-sounding specials like knockwurst and bacon in a Japanese coconut-curry sauce with rice. C’mon. If that's not a class-action lawsuit waiting to happen, we don’t know what is. — Ron Patronite and Robin Raisfeld

Related Stories

Featured In

• Cheap Eats Guide 2006 (8/7/06)
• Top Five Onion Rings (7/28/03)
• 100 Under $25 (7/28/03)

Recipes at Schnäck

• Punkin' Ale Shake (2005)