(Photo: Jeff Mermelstein)

She approached Dmitri. She put her hand on his shoulder. His face darkened, as if a grave mistake had been perpetrated, and it was his duty to set it right. Then Lucy began to talk. She was on Reddit several hours a day, she said. Would she tell him her screen name? Not right away, no. Maybe later. Her phone number, in the meantime, yes? Yes. She was interested in politics and animals. What was Dmitri interested in?

“Politics,” he said. “I’m a little more conservative on some things and a little more liberal on others. Than the usual, I mean.”

“That’s nice,” Lucy said. “I like the kitten pictures sometimes.”

“That’s a stereotype!”

“But it’s true!”

They both laughed.

“What do you do IRL?” she asked.

Dmitri told her.

“Sometimes I think we have a common language, being on Reddit. We read the same stuff, see the same pictures. I think we’re pretty—”

“Smart!” they said in unison.

“Maybe we’re even smarter than the average person,” Dmitri suggested boldly.

“Sure,” she said, adding, “I don’t like listening to guys complain about not having girlfriends.”

“No one does,” he said.

And then Dmitri and Lucy wandered off to be alone.

Related:

• Archive: “Features”
• Articles by Matthew Shaer
• Table of Contents: Jul 16, 2012 issue of New York | Subscribe!