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Mountain View: A Harem of “Founder Hounders”


If you’re an attractive woman in tech, odds are you’ve hooked up with a fair amount of people in the industry. I’m probably at the lower end of what these women are trying to hook up with, but I’ve hooked up with almost all of them. What they’re mostly interested in is power, and in San Francisco, that traditionally is around tech founders. The hounders’ ultimate target? Anybody at the top of a pre-IPO start-up. The Pinterest dude. The Dropbox dude. The Snapchat dude. I mean, he was dating Taylor Swift or something, right? If you look at Secret, 95 percent of it is Asian bitches wanting Drew Houston.

I remember one time, these girls ran into me and my friends and found out that we were Google engineers. They said, “We need to hang out.” They looked very different than the girls on the Google campus.

More recently, some girl came over to my place as part of a larger group. My place is nothing amazing, but I guess it gives you the impression that I have some amount of money. She knew I had a girlfriend, and she got kind of drunk and said, “Come to this bar.” It progressed from there to sending pictures of herself. Eventually, naked pictures. And I was like, You know what? I really like these pictures. But I feel guilty because I have a girlfriend.


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