The Macaulay Culkin Show
Shea Stadium, 20 Meadow St., nr. Waterbury St., Williamsburg; 12/15 at 7 p.m.
No, the Home Alone star and pizza lyricist isn't affiliated with this comedy variety show. But Wyatt Cenac, Shonali Bhowmik, Bridey Elliot, and a whole lot more are, for only $5. And that's just as good, right?
The Capitol Theater, 149 Westchester Ave., nr. Pearl St., Port Chester, N.Y.; 914-937-4126; 12/12 at 8 p.m.
A master of characters and a commander of laughs. For this League and Comedy Central star, it's only the beginning. Everyone's favorite sleepwalker, Mike Birbiglia, opens.
A John Waters Christmas
Stage 48 , 605 W. 48th St., nr. Eleventh Ave.; 212-957-1800; 12/13 and 12/14 at 7:30 p.m.
In case downtown drag king Murray Hill's A Murray Little Christmas isn’t quite blasphemous enough for you this weekend, the Pope of Trash is in town that same night.
St. Ann's Warehouse, 29 Jay St., nr. Plymouth St., Brooklyn; 718-254-8779; through 12/21
Kitson is a witty, think-y, luxuriantly bearded performer who is, kind of, Yorkshire’s answer to Spalding Gray. He'll be on stage for this piece, but don't expect him to utter a word. The show is conducted completely through twenty-three tape decks.
Employee of the Month
Upright Citizen's Brigade Theatre, 307 W. 26th St., nr. Eighth Ave.; 212-366-9176; 12/18 at 8 p.m.
This installment of the live version of Catie Lazarus's comedy podcast features musician Kathleen Hanna, author Piper Kerman (Orange is the New Black), Tony nominee Maria Dizzia, and journalist Jon Ronson.