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If Celine Dion Sang Opera, We’d Reconsider

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Who does this Michael Greene think he is, a big shot? He runs the Grammys. Not even the Oscars, much less America’s ass-kickingest city. Now that’s something to run. That’s an accomplishment. Ten million people, all of them trying to jaywalk at once. You keep a crowd like that out of the crosswalks at rush hour, then you get the right to charge around like a tin-pot dictator, bullying your employees and yelling “off with his head.” But only then. If you think you can just cruise into town with your celebrity entourage and start making trouble -- cutting the mayor out of a press conference, swearing at his aides -- well, this city’s going to show you its ugly side. Take your attitude back to L.A., buddy. Your show brings in forty million bucks? We could recoup the loss easy. Let’s see, at $50 for every ticketable pedestrian offense, that’s only . . .


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