Christopher Lowell, host–designer: “Leona Helmsley. Even if she’s humbled, there will only be a slight shift in management.”
Joseph Holtzman, editor, Nest: “Let Martha Stewart run her own business. America owes her infinitely more than she owes us.”
Mayer Rus, design editor, House & Garden: “How about Rosie O’Donnell? She brings a less uptight, more Everyman look. For her magazine comeback, she could do a pictorial of a flannel-shirt fashion show on one of her same-sex cruises.”
B. Smith, lifestyle expert: “It should be me, B.! Instead of an M&A—mergers-and-acquisitions deal—it will be an M&B—Martha and B.—conglomerate, like merging McDonald’s and Burger King.”
Paige Rense, editor, Architectural Digest: “I’d still buy her linens now. I view this as a hiatus until Martha comes back to us. I don’t see why she wouldn’t be welcome. Even O. J. Simpson plays golf with people now, and he did something really wrong.”
Dan Klores, PR king: “Mel Gibson. He’s a con man with a proven track record of duping people into spending money.”
Donny Deutsch, adman: “Hopefully, George Bush, if he’s unemployed in November. He seems to think it’s his job to tell people what’s in good taste and what’s not.”